How You Gonna Keep 'Em Down on the Farm? is an episode of the Alvin and the Chipmunks series.
The Chipmunks visit the farm of Dave's parents. Once there, Theodore takes care of Clarence, a young brown cow, who he enters into the County-Farm Fair. However, he is shocked to find that the cow who wins first place is slaughtered for beef, so Theodore and Clarence run away. Theodore and Clarence try to get on a train but are thrown off and they face similar fates when they attempt to enter buildings together. Theodore goes to look for food to feed Clarence, but the restaurant he goes to was robbed. A photographer foolishly takes a picture of Theodore and Clarence instead of the thief. Realizing that they are accused of the crime, Theodore and Clarence set off to leave the country but luckily, Dave, Alvin, and Simon find them first revealing that the thief was arrested. Grandpa Seville later assures Theodore that Clarence will live on the Seville Farm unharmed.
- "On The Road Again" originally performed by Willie Nelson.
- The title references the famous post-World War I phrase, "How're you going to keep them down on the farm once they've seen Gay Paree?"
- This is the second episode "On the Road Again" was covered; the first being Setting the Record Straight.
- A clip from the episode later appears in the episode Chipmunkmania.